Hi Reader

Over the past year, I’ve been thinking a lot about “soft skills”.

How you interact with people. How you make them feel. And the impact it has on life, not just business.

And I’ve always found it frustrating that they’re called soft skills, because while they might not be quantifiable on a spreadsheet or end of year accounts, they are so important.

They give us The Invisible Advantage in these AI times. An advantage which means so much and leaves a lasting impression.

In July 2014 I was back in Bristol for my friend Mary’s hen weekend. It was only a few weeks after I’d finished chemo for Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. I was still feeling fragile and my hair was only just starting to grow back.

I wanted something new to wear so headed into Warehouse in Cabot Circus - one of my go-to places before I was sick.

But after everything that had happened that year, I was feeling self conscious. I didn’t know what suited me anymore.

I selected a few items, took them shyly to the till and handed them to the shop assistant.
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​“It’s my first night out after finishing chemo and I wasn’t sure what would look good” I told her.

Her reply has stayed with me ever since.

“I think you look like a rock star.”

She won’t remember that exchange. I was one of hundreds of shoppers each week (remember those days?!).

But for me, those generous words gave me a boost when I needed it most. And it was priceless.

2014 was challenging (to say the least) in so many ways. But it also showed me the kindness of people - strangers, friends, family.

These moments have shaped how I work today.

In a world where everything is getting automated or we don’t know if we’re speaking to a chatbot or real person, I value the in person experience more and more.

Yesterday morning was Netwalk and Talk, my monthly netwalking event at Weston Park.

There was a mix of new guests and familiar faces, conversation was flowing and the weather was gorgeous.

When I was planning the first N+T event in early 2024, I thought carefully about its flow. I wanted it to be relaxed, informative and welcoming, without the pressures of a 60 second pitch or formal introductions..

So when one of the guests said to me earlier “Charlotte, I like coming because I know I’ll never be left on my own, you’ll make me feel welcome, and you’ll introduce me to others”, it made my day.

This is how I want people to feel when they come to my events.

This is my Invisible Advantage.

Reader, how do you want people to feel when they work with you? What’s your Invisible Advantage?

Best,
​
Charlotte

P.S. The Invisible Advantage isn't something you can automate. It's how you make people feel. In Conference Prep VIP sessions, we work on this - not just what you say, but how people experience you. April bookings open. Hit reply.

NO PROMPT THIS WEEK

Some things can't be automated or optimised.

Sometimes the invisible advantage is just... being present. Being kind. Paying attention.

No prompt needed for that.

HOW THE COVER WAS CREATED

Reader, truthfully, this one gave me a headache. It stopped being the fun, creative project it was intended to be.

ChatGPT wanted to lock me into templates and a repeatable process. It kept pulling toward what it already knew. Safe. Competent. Recognisable. While I wanted to try different styles.

With such a personal story, I also thought about whether Charl Ex M (aka CXM) had her place on the cover at all.

What I keep noticing in the frustration: AI optimises for what's worked before. It irons out the unpredictable. But creativity doesn't work like that. It's messy. It doesn't always know where it's going. Sometimes you only recognise the right answer when you see it.

AI can execute. It can iterate. But it can't want something different.

That part is still ours. Another invisible advantage.